Om du var vaken, skulle jag GE dig!

I currently obsess over the band Kite and my approaching midnight deadline. It's an OK combination. That time when I obsessed over cheese and jelly candy was a much worse combination, according to some. Or that time when I obsessed over having my left foot removed in combination with buying leftover right shoes to some highly affordable prices.

Anyway, the above video is to be watched as a tribute to me and tiny's dream version of our time in Paris back in spring -07, with the introducing line "wake up, you fucking dyke".

Oddballs, perfume, curse of the mousse

Ape puts on perfume and smells like one of those sunshiny, flowery, fairytale spring mornings, where clean isn’t simply a description, but a 4-dimensional cartoon, which you can smell.

Lolly puts on perfume and smells like the oriental mistress, whose comforting touch and libido is woven of silky embraces of musk and oranges and obscure passion.

tiny puts on perfume and smells of inexplicable and unearthly perfection and something supposedly ephemeral, for no matter how much you smell her you can never fully grasp its complexity.

And me, I put on perfume, which as it hits my skin reacts, evolves and smells of something sticky, unbearable and ill-boding. Almost like the way you might detect an assertive-smelling smell, not knowing what it is and wonder whether it smells good or bad before you realize it’s rottening garbage you smell. Or zombies. That’s me using perfume. Any perfume.

feeling disabled over here!

You know how kids with dyslexia get extra help in school, or how disabled kids get wheelchair access and stuff like that. Could I get a personal tutor and ass-into-gear-kicker?

Cause I really need one. Someone with enough authority to sit me down and make me do the work I am supposed to do. Like a study-buddy with a whip and no carrots.

I really, really need one. I'm poor, I've also got poor coordination and eyes-sight and I can't cook (not really) so I've got nothing to offer in return, but I still need an authoritative study-buddy once autumn comes around. So if you know anyone who take pity on fools and carries a whip, point them in my direction.

And while we wait for my saviour lets listen to Tobias Fünke's long lost twin sing;