feeling disabled over here!

You know how kids with dyslexia get extra help in school, or how disabled kids get wheelchair access and stuff like that. Could I get a personal tutor and ass-into-gear-kicker?

Cause I really need one. Someone with enough authority to sit me down and make me do the work I am supposed to do. Like a study-buddy with a whip and no carrots.

I really, really need one. I'm poor, I've also got poor coordination and eyes-sight and I can't cook (not really) so I've got nothing to offer in return, but I still need an authoritative study-buddy once autumn comes around. So if you know anyone who take pity on fools and carries a whip, point them in my direction.

And while we wait for my saviour lets listen to Tobias Fünke's long lost twin sing;